I cease to feel melancholy ages ago. I wish I could be more sympathetic. Caustic vibes more acidic than cider to give you acute gastritis--that's what I'm churning. It sickens myself.
Voltaire's got tonnes of spit at the back of his throat for sticklers of a rigid system be it religion or philosophy or social. Can't believe I found his recklessly anti-religion collection "Candide" in the national library in medieval-looking cloth binding looking like a Holy Bible (that tickles me). how how how ironic. we need this brilliant mind to educate us on the source of racism, ethnocentricism, sexism, religionism blah blah, and to challenge blind following in doctrines.
He rejuvenated my blunt mind and pulls me back from that cliff of oblivion!!!
but still there's a sick taste in my mouth, the fear lays bricks on the breath. i'm wasting life waiting

Just bought Dangerous Lives of the Altar Boys VCD from Towers at $9 cos I missed that movie in theatre. I watched Ghost world cos of the relation to comics. The latter is something i can connect to. I never like action heroes but the fusion of genres lured me. Thought Kieran is more at home in this one than Igby since he is mixing with casts his age at least; same ironic grin with negative remorse over his outrageous pranks though he cries like his mum kicked the bucket over a dead dog *shrugs*
(heard Jim Yoshii Pile-up's 'Seattle, WA'? melancholic tune-moody singing-drifts-upon the washing waves-of the piano solo-"let seattle wash me") if u want the mp3, CLICK and then sift it out on this page.

"IGBY goes down" beats Catcher in the Rye hands down!! it is so New York esp when the camera pans the streets of NYC, contrasting the cluttered interiors of the bohos (a term to desribe bums parading as artists in Soho) and the elite's apartments....so real it haunts you even though Mr Culkin at first seemed not so comfortable reciting the wordy, smartass script; his nonchanlance sticks to you. There is none of the pining nostalgia and self-pity saturated in Holden Caulfield (that's fine in literature but sucky on screen). If the allstar cast doesn't appeal to you, perhaps the indie OST (beta band, dandy warhols, travis, coldplay) will. That gives a youthful (and rock) rhythm (besides Kieran's) to the predominantly middle-age cast.

I donno why I bother to go for the teaching interview again. not a fat chance they will accept me. I was sketching at Arab St earlier on with a cockerel roosting beside me. maybe i'll be in England next summer...putting too much hope on it i guess.

I love to go a-wandering
until the day I die
And as I go, I love to sing
My knapsack on my back
verderi-iiiii verdera-aaaaa verda-hahahaha
(this is all i rem from a song from primary school music class)

Just as I was thinking of doodling something about graduates (a la ME) who can't seem (more like lack of bother) to get a great yuppie job, i find this-- cool comics on scottish society by much-lacking-in-quantity-in-comic-realm female artist Lorna Miller-- have a PEEP at her works

I just found out there are so many butoh workshops in UK and NY. Man!! I must work harder towards the $6k! Go London, if possible, Berlin, Spain, i absolutely have no idea what i want in life, but ironic thing is my mind is kinda singletrack. Postmodern is so in, everyone doing mixgenre but if i cant even grasp the essence of anything, where will this lead me to i wonder.