I need a break from this pretense. I haven't been myself for these past 2 months cos I've been selling my soul for some cash. I think it's ok to do that if you know what you are selling your soul for. That's what I thought initially but you know you can't trick the Devil. I thought.......I'll just be a yes-man and get through these observation period so I'll go on to NIE then be posted to some crap place to teach and be some lowlife there. Everything is brown (ie shit) everywhere. Now my soul is gone, I don't know what to do. It's so comfortable sinking into oblivion and I actually feel.......glad. No intellectual and sexual intercourse. Is this it?????????